How I Became a Girl
How I Became a Girl
It all started for me when I was 14 years old.
I used to baby-sit for my auntie who was quite attractive and sexy.
I don’t know what impulse drove me but one night I decided to find where she kept her underwear.
In her dressing table was a draw full of lingerie. I tried on a pair of her panties and became so aroused that I nearly fainted.
Before long I added a bra and slip to my ensemble and admired myself in the dressing table mirror. My erection was so intense that I only had to touch myself to experience a shattering orgasm.
Afterwards I felt a curious mixture of shame and excitement but when she asked me to baby-sit again I couldn’t wait to continue my experiment.
Over the next few months I graduated to dressing fully in her clothes,(including stockings) and wearing lipstick.
I also terrified myself by walking about in the garden hoping no-one would see me but just as fervently hoping that someone would!
I had no idea what drove me to do this only that it increasingly felt more natural to be dressed as a girl and that I wanted to do it all the time. This was impossible of course because I was still at school and had no resources of my own and couldn’t share my secret with anybody.
I had to content myself with my weekly babysitting/dressing sessions and borrowing some of my mothers underwear and clothes when home alone. I did manage to save enough money to buy myself a bra and some panties,the urge to own some female garments of my own was enough to override the fear and embarrassment of going into the shop and purchasing them.
I wore these under my male clothes whenever possible.
I still had no idea what it was that I was doing,I had never heard of cross dressing or transvestism just that I wanted to dress permanently in female clothing and be like the teenage girls that I felt myself attracted to,I suppose because I coveted their clothes,their makeup,their breasts and their vaginas (although I hadn’t yet seen one).
I hadn’t had any sexual experience beyond masturbating at this stage.
I lived in a constant state of sexual frustration not knowing who I was or what I was.
Fortunately at this stage something else intervened to alleviate in part this sorry state I was in.
I became involved in music.
I had been learning to play the guitar and joined a band. They were all older than me but I was discovering that I had some talent.
This became a focus and enabled me to cope with what still seemed to me the mystifying problem of my sexuality.
Were there others like me out there somewhere? If so they weren’t to be found in the Northern town where I was living at the time.
The band did well and when I was 16 we got a management deal and moved to London.
This didn’t work out well and after a year we all moved back up North except for Dave, the drummer.
After a few months I decided to move back to London to start a duo with Dave and this is where the story really begins(thank goodness I hear you say!)
After living briefly in a few unsuitable places we eventually found a flat share with a 36 year old Italian woman called Agetina. Dave and I did lots of auditions but not many gigs so eventually he took a job as a chef as money was tight.
Agetina worked as a seamstress from home and she suggested that I help her in lieu of rent by sorting out the component parts of the garments she was making and tacking them together. As these were exclusively female clothes
I was very happy to do this as it also seemed like a job a girl would do.
Dave was often out of the house as he worked long hours and one evening after drinking quite a lot of wine Agetina seduced me.
As this was my very first sexual encounter with either a man or a woman it wasn’t wholly satisfactory for either of us but as this became almost a daily experience she slowly instructed me in how to give her satisfaction.
She seemed to prefer oral sex to penetration and wow so did I!To be able to have such intimate contact with a vagina so long an object of my veneration,to explore it with my mouth and my tongue, to inhale her feminine essence and drink her cunt juices was like a dream.
I would often spend upwards of an hour between her thighs completely content as she had many orgasms and I tried to ingest the very essence of woman to take it inside me and somehow make myself more feminine.
One day while I was down between her legs she told me that she was bisexual and preferred to have sex with women but this was so wonderful it was a pity I wasn’t a girl because then it would be perfect.
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing,I told her I always felt that I should have been a girl and blurted out everything that I had been feeling since the age of 14.
She became very excited at this and said that we would have to transform me.
The problem was that Dave was still around but the following day this was also resolved.
He said that he’d had enough of his job and was moving back to Scunthorpe.
I pretended to be disappointed but secretly of course I was delighted.
On the day I returned from seeing Dave off at the station my transformation began.
Laid out on the bed was a complete female wardrobe,bra,panties, stockings a suspender belt (this was before tights became popular) tops ,skirts,nighties even some shoes in my size.
In the short time before Dave’s departure Agetina had been busy shopping.
We began with a bath and the complete removal of every last vestige of body hair which fortunately for me had always been very sparse.
Agetina chose an outfit for me and helped me to dress including padding out my bra as at this point my chest was rather flat(If only I had known what was in store for me later!)
I wore my hair long as was fashionable at that time so it only required a bit of styling.
I knew nothing at that point about makeup and was beside myself with excitement as Agetina applied foundation, blusher,eye shadow,mascara and lipstick topping it all off with a spray of delicious perfume.
Nothing could have prepared me for the first sight of myself in the mirror,I just couldn’t believe my eyes,there in the mirror was an attractive teenage girl and that girl was me!
I just stood there murmuring ‘thank you… Thank you’ over and over again.
That night we celebrated with a special meal.
Agetina said it was my birthday party as I had finally been reborn as a girl and today was the first real day of my life. That night we were at last able to sl**p together and have sex as two women. I spent a very long time between her thighs that night and after she had repaired my makeup she fucked me (with me underneath as always) three or maybe four times but certainly until we were both exhausted.
I think that day was undoubtedly the happiest day of my life.
The following morning began a huge learning curve ,the daily rituals of keeping my body smooth and moisturized,learning to apply makeup,walk in heels and a hundred other things designed to eradicate my former male self.
I went through the next week in a dreamlike state as I became totally transformed into a teenage girl.
Agetina threw away all my male clothes so if I wanted to leave the house it had to be as a girl.
I was very nervous at the prospect the first time. I wore a pink dress just above the knee,tan stockings,white sling backs,my hair which Agetina had died blonde was styled in a fashionable bob,my makeup was carefully applied I looked fantastic. I slowly gained confidence as I realized that I was totally convincing and returned home in a state of great excitement. Agetina loved her new creation because that is what I was. I was also now completely dependent on her ,a fact that excited both of us and was to become the focus of our relationship.
One night soon after my first venture out we were having sex. Penetrative sex was very rare now so I was in my usual position,between her thighs my tongue and mouth providing satisfaction.
‘I need to pee’ she said but I’m much too comfortable to move. Press your lips firmly against my cunt and open your mouth’.
When I realized what was about to happen I was consumed with excitement.
I glued my lips around her smooth shaven mound, gently opened her engorged and glistening cunt lips and waited in anticipation.
As the first drops of golden liquid entered my mouth I gulped it down greedily savoring the slightly salty taste, it became a stream flooding my mouth and throat almost too fast for me to drink but I swallowed hungrily not spilling a drop. I worshiped Agetinas cunt and savored her vaginal juices so I regarded drinking her pee as a privilege and an honor.
‘In future this will be one of your many duties’ she said. After this she would often wake me in the night and relieve herself in my mouth. I suppose this was the start of our long intense journey into complete subservience and submission for me and complete domination over me for her,a relationship that became so extreme in the next two years that it hardly seems possible that one person could control another so completely,but I’m getting ahead of myself here.
Our daily routine would begin with me getting up early to bathe,shave,apply makeup and dress. The thrill of wearing a bra, panties and the exquisite feeling of pulling on sheer stockings always aroused me. I calmed myself in order to appear completely feminine(no bulges) before making breakfast and presenting myself to Agetina.
One morning she said ‘I have made you into a woman and you are totally dependent on me which I think we both enjoy but in order for things to progress and to effect your total transformation I need to control you completely.
I require you to be totally subservient completely submissive and to obey me absolutely whatever I demand from you ,no matter how extreme. I love you so you must trust me because what I have planned for us is almost unimaginable,I nearly faint with excitement just thinking about it.
I agreed to this with alacrity because I loved her and trusted her implicitly.
Continuing she said ‘You are already my cunt slave and you must continue to worship it,my cunt’s satisfaction,cleanliness and well being are to be your first concern.
You must be a repository for my piss whenever I require it and start each day by cleaning it thoroughly with your tongue. You must also keep it smooth and clean shaven. As from today it is also forbidden territory for your cock. Both your cock and balls are something we must eventually deal with to complete your sex change. Now take off your clothes because we must start the process of making you utterly and completely subservient.
When I was naked she produced a large cane. ‘If as you say you wish to be totally possessed by me you musn’t ask me to stop’ she said. I eagerly agreed. ‘This is the very last chance to change your mind’ she said. ‘I just want to be a girl your cunt slave and anything else you want me to be ‘I replied.
The beating when it began was quite gentle,just stinging my arse cheeks.
As she continued the strokes became harder and more painful and over the next few minutes almost unbearable.
The pain became more intense and I started to cry but still she didn’t stop. I realized that this was all an affirmation of the commitment that I had just made.
The more I cried the harder she seemed to beat me. We had become one,me in my pain and Agetina in her frenzied assault on my bottom.
Amazingly after awhile I realized that I didn’t want her to stop,that it was the most intense experience I had ever had and thankfully the beating continued until she was exhausted.
When it ceased I was still crying but in a state of almost heightened awareness and arousal. I noticed for the first time that Agetina was naked and equally excited as I was. ’Kneel before me’ she said, I dropped to my knees and she crushed my face into her cunt and a wave of shattering orgasms possessed her as my mouth and tongue probed her hole and her cunt lips.
She pushed me back on to the bed murmuring
‘Maybe just one last time but you mustn’t come’ as she straddled me and engulfed my cock with the wet warmth and softness of her love hole.
She laid on top of me shuddering as the orgasms continued as I desperately fought to prevent my own climax. We stayed in this position for a long time, just joined together until my erection subsided.
We both knew that something profound had occurred that she now possessed me completely. I was utterly submissive to her in mind, body and soul. ’This is just the beginning’ she said.
When we had recovered she took several silk scarves and tied me spreadeagled to each of the four bedposts. Raising my head she blindfolded me,pushed a scarf in my mouth and gagged me. I was now completely helpless and at her mercy.
At first I felt a little frightened but then I began to feel excited,I had no idea what was going to happen. She stroked and pinched my nipples until they were erect.
‘This will hurt you,but not as much as the real thing which we will obtain later’
I felt an intense pain as she fastened (as I found out later) clothes pegs with a strong spring clip to my nipples.
The sensation coupled with the stinging warmth still emanating from my buttocks and the feeling of utter vulnerability was almost peaceful
And I knew that if this was indeed the first step then there were no limits to what we would do together.
She left me like this for an hour or more. When she returned I heard her moving about the room and eventually she took off the clothes pegs untied me and removed the blindfold and gag.
On the bedside table were a selection of dildos of different sizes,a small plastic vibrator and a larger rubber dildo both of which I had seen before because Agetina had liked me to lick off her cunt juices when she had used them on herself. In addition was a much larger one and a large plug shaped device narrow at both ends but huge in the middle. ’You don’t have a cunt but you have the next best thing,your arsehole.
At the moment you are a virgin but we are going to open you up ready for your initiation’.
She arranged me on the bed with a pillow under my bum and told me to raise my legs.
She applied lots of lubricant to my hole and to the small vibrator. She pushed it firmly against my hole and as my sphincter relaxed it slipped in surprisingly easily. This was the first time I had had anything inside me and once I had got over the unfamiliar sensation I found that I enjoyed the feeling particularly when the vibrator was turned on.
After a few minutes of pushing it in and out of my now relaxed hole it was time for the second larger one. This was a tighter fit but it wasn’t long before it was gliding smoothly in and out as Agetina fucked me with it.
It was a fantastic feeling. I had often fantasied about having sex with a man but had no idea that my arsehole would feel this good with something being pushed inside it,
Imagine what a real cock would be like.
Little was I to know that I would soon find out!
For now we continued with our stretching exercises on a daily basis until I was finally able to take the huge plug inside me. After that Agetina experimented with ever bigger objects ,bottles,a large cucumber anything that had a vaguely phallic shape.
After a week or so my arsehole was huge when stretched and I was eager to make it even bigger.
Finally one day she told me to lie on the bed,my arse on the edge and to raise my legs.
She knelt on the floor to gain maximum access to my hole. She applied lots of lubricant inserted two fingers and slowly began to fuck me. I felt another finger go in then another and finally all five fingers were inside me. Telling me to relax she continued for another ten minutes or so.
My arsehole felt absolutely enormous and then her hand was inside!
She didn’t stop there but carried on slowly and purposefully fucking me and opening me up still wider. I felt her clench her fist inside me as she slipped even further in as far as her wrist. I felt completely possessed as waves of sexual excitement swept over me.
Still she didn’t stop until she had buried several inches of her arm in me.
We stayed like this for several minutes,locked together her fingers probing inside creating indescribable sensations. ’I’m going to take my hand out soon and when I do I want you to hold your arse cheeks apart’ she said as she slowly began to remove herself. Finally her fingers slipped out and I heard her gasp.
‘It’s incredible,a huge gaping hole,its wonderful!’ she said.
I felt not only empty but emotionally bereft,this was the most intimate contact I had ever had with another human being.
’I have only ever done this once before and that was to another woman’s cunt and now your arse/cunt she said.
As she spoke she took the large plug dildo and with one movement thrust it up inside me. It was tapered so my hole closed over the end with only the two lugs that stopped it slipping out of reach visible. She turned me over and with the cane began beating my bottom with the dildo still inside.
Such was her sexual high that she began with the intensity that usually concluded one of our sessions. The pain was unbelievable but I exalted in it and she carried on until we were both crying and in a state of complete exhaustion. She laid on the bed and told me to get between her thighs. She squeezed my head between her legs as I thrust my tongue inside her. Abruptly she raised her legs and said breathlessly ‘Push your tongue in my other hole!’ I put my hands under her buttocks and pulled her arsehole onto my mouth licking around the puckered hole until I gradually gained entry.
I fucked her with my tongue until she eventually lowered her legs and I turned my attentions once more to her glorious cunt. She came violently and I lay between her legs for a very long time savoring and ingesting her vaginal juices.
When we recovered she said ‘I have something very serious to say to you,what has just happened was a life changing experience. It has released something within me so powerful that it frightens me.
If we continue I don’t know where this will end. You are very young and I know you want this as much as me but I am going to give you one last chance to end it.
If you want to carry on two things must happen. As from today you must only refer to me as Madam. Secondly you no longer have any will of your own and you have only a female identity from now on your name will be Suzanne.
This is how it must be. I will demand absolute unquestioning obedience and you must be prepared to undergo humiliation,pain and total feminisation,there will be no turning back. If you agree kneel before me and kiss my feet. ’
I needed no second bidding and showered her feet with kisses.
We began the process in earnest. Each day I would rise early make myself look pretty and serve Madam breakfast. I had to undertake all my domestic duties dressed as a maid.
It was a very feminine outfit,black dress with a white apron, black stockings and flat shoes. When she had finished I attended to her cunt, cleaning it with my tongue,sometimes Madam would relieve herself in my mouth and then she raised her legs and I performed the same duty for her sweet arsehole making sure to push my tongue far inside.
Then it was time for the first of several beatings which were performed with me naked.
I then had to spend time tied to the bed,blindfolded and gagged. Madam attached nipple clamps,this time the real thing that could be progressively tightened to cause excruciating pain. My balls were also tied very tightly Madam would remove the blindfold so that I could see them turn red then almost black as the bl**d supply was cut off. I hoped that this would cause permanent damage eventually but she always released them before it got critical.
Genital torture became part of our daily routine. As well as tying my balls she would spank both my cock and balls using a kitchen spatula with a rubber blade. This caused intense pain and sometimes bruising as the skin of the penis is quite tender.
One day she grasped the skin of my scrotum and thrust a safety pin through which was agonising. She released me from my bonds and handed me another 12 pins.
’I am leaving you for about 30 minutes and when I return I want to see the skin of your balls pierced with all of these pins’ she said.
The first attempt was not very successful as I gingerly pressed the point of the pin against the skin. I had to do Madams’ bidding or suffer the consequences and anyway the whole point of my existence was to please her. I pressed harder and pulled the skin tight against the point and was rewarded by feeling it slowly piercing the double fold of skin.
As the point came through I felt a sense of achievement and set about repeating the painful exercise another 11 times. The pain really aroused me and although Madam was pleased with my efforts she wasn’t pleased with the sight of my erection and rewarded me by beating my cock and balls with the cane. It was thrilling when the cane caught one of the pins,pain was now a d**g to both of us.
On another occasion she handed me a piece of wood ,a small hammer and some tacks.
‘I want you to nail your scrotum to the wood so that it is stretched’ she said.
I placed the wood on the arm of a chair and pressed the first tack so that it pierced the skin and then hammered it through. The pain was exquisite. It took another 8 or 9 tacks to fully stretch the skin of my balls on to the wood.
This excited both us so much that Madam threw me on to the bed and beat me while I was lying on top of my painfully secured balls.
Her ingenuity knew no bounds. She obtained a small device that was used for pressing neckties,just two flat pieces of wood with a screw device on each side that tightened down.
She tied my balls tightly and put them into the press and screwed it up until they were flattened.
I was left in this condition for several hours and when the screws were released my balls stayed flat for some time. I adored this systematic destruction of my testicles and I think both of us knew what the final outcome would be. The thought of it excited me beyond belief, although she had not yet used the word castration I knew that was what would happen one day and I wanted it desperately.
On other occasions I was instructed to crawl around naked for a whole day with the large plug dildo inside me,nipple clamps attached and sometimes with the tie press suspended from my balls as they were crushed flat and to sl**p on the floor at the foot of the bed. I loved this extreme humiliation,the pain and punishment and the feeling that I was entering a state of nothingness,unable to survive except as an adjunct to Madam.
Even when undergoing extreme humiliation,beating and being completely debased I wanted to go even further to please her.
In this maelstrom of sexual activity the day to day business of life still had to happen.
I was responsible for all domestic duties,washing,cleaning,dusting cooking and shopping. Whatever I was doing I had to be perfectly groomed and entirely feminine.
In the house I had to wear my maids uniform but was allowed to change when I left the house to go shopping.
Although I looked convincingly like a teenage girl my voice sometimes was a giveaway. I tried to raise my voice so that it was more like a females but it did generate a few curious looks. I got to know quite a few locals on my shopping trips. We lived in Ladbrook Grove which in the sixties was quite a decadent ,hippie like area and some people knew that I was a transsexual but seemed not to care.
Live and let live.
I had only just learned the term transsexual. I suppose I had started as a transvestite,the very first time I had worn my aunties clothes I knew I was different but how I felt went way beyond clothes. Even though I still had male genitalia I knew that I was and always would be a woman.
There was still one anomaly with our relationship. Although I was completely dependent and subservient to Madam I was also dependent on her financially,she still worked as a seamstress in order to support both of us.
I still helped her but it was a far from satisfactory situation but one that was soon to be resolved.
One afternoon following a beating that reached new highs for both of us she tied me to the bed but left my legs free and only blindfolded me leaving the gag out.
‘You have a treat in store this afternoon’ she said.
I was left for sometime but later heard who I thought was Madam enter the room.
I heard the sound of someone undressing but as I was forbidden to speak I couldn’t ask what was happening.
Someone knelt astride me and I felt something brush my lips and then press against them forcing them apart. I instantly knew that it was a cock as the tip entered my mouth and I gagged a little when it touched the back of my throat. Suddenly my mouth was full of cock.
I had often dreamed of this and now it was really happening.
I sucked and licked it as I did when cleaning Madams juices from her dildo This got an immediate reaction. Whoever it was began to slowly fuck my mouth as I eagerly licked and sucked wanting more of it inside. I loved the smooth feel of the shaft as it slid between my lips. I tried to push it into my cheek so that I could engulf even more of this wonderful manflesh.
I hated my own cock but I certainly wanted more of this one.
His breathing became heavier and the strokes more urgent as I sucked harder.
With a shudder he came into my mouth and I swallowed his sweet cum greedily.
He removed his cock and brushed the tip across my lips smearing them with the last vestiges of cum.
‘You certainly seemed to like that’ said Madam who had been watching all this take place.
’Now satisfy my cunt while Michael(for that was his name)recovers,watching that has made me all wet. ’ She untied me and I slid down the bed a little. Madam removed my blindfold, positioned herself over my face and smothered me with her soaking wet cunt. I buried my tongue deep inside and drank deeply of her feminine essence quickly bringing about several orgasms. I was in heaven, cock and cunt all within the space of a few minutes!
Michael who had grown firm once more put a pillow under my bum.
This gave me chance to look at his cock. It was huge. It must have been about eight and a half to nine inches long with a thick shaft and uncircumcised. I raised my legs as I learned to do during the regular dildo sessions with Madam in anticipation of what was about to happen.
Michael applied lots of lubricant in and around my hole and on his cock. He pressed the tip against me.
I relaxed my sphincter as Madam had taught me to do when inserting a variety of objects inside me. Michael’s cock in spite of it’s size slipped in easily,a few inches at first and then right to the hilt his balls making contact with my arse cheeks. I was in ecstasy, I had fantasized about this very situation since puberty and now here I was filled with cock. He began to fuck me with long slow strokes,his cock tantalizingly almost slipping out and then plunging back in to fill me with his hard shaft.
I was in heaven,I never wanted it to end. The long strokes got harder and more intense until he was pounding in to me penetrating deep inside me.
He shuddered and I felt his hot cum spurt into my arse, oh god this was what I wanted cock,cock and more cock. Fortunately dreams sometimes do come true and this is what I got.
For the rest of the week Michael came every day and fucked me,sometimes several times.
I just couldn’t get enough. Madam watched all these sessions and on one wonderful occasion participated. I lay between her thighs sucking and licking her cunt as Michael fucked my hole. I felt as though I was reduced to just a means of giving sexual pleasure
A wonderful feeling of debasement and complete subservience. I was reduced to two orifices I was nothing but a fuckhole and I gloried in it.
‘The last few days have been a sort of training session,from now on this is how we will make money,there are lots of men out there who love the idea of sex with a shemale because that is what you are,a girl with a cock.
I’m going to put small cards in phone boxes to attract them’ She said.
Within days the phone had started to ring and I prepared myself for my first client in a state of heightened excitement. I was not only Madams’ slave I was also now a means for us to obtain the wherewithal to live well. I was a prostitute. I couldn’t have been happier.
Up to this point I had only seen one other cock besides my own and that was Michael’s, yet here I was about to embark on a career selling sex to men.
My first encounter went well in spite of my nervousness. His cock was quite small compared to Michael’s but I was soon to learn that it was about an average size.
I spent a long time sucking and licking both his cock and balls until he was very hard,ready and eager to fuck me.
Due to the recent attentions of Michael and the size of his cock my copiously lubricated hole was well and truly stretched.
With one thrust he was soon buried deep inside me and pounding away. It took just a few minutes before he was filling me with his creamy cum.
One other encounter took place that day and then a couple more that week. The following week it was at least one a day and within a month I was seeing on average six men a day. It was incredible,cocks of all sizes,large ,small and occasionally enormous.
I loved them all but I particularly enjoyed the very big ones as my hole had become soft ,stretched and pliable and able to accommodate the biggest of cocks with ease.
They say practice makes perfect,well I was certainly getting plenty of that,sometimes being fucked up to 40 times a week.
I became an artist at sex. I used my sphincter muscles to squeeze and make even a small cock seem like a tight fit.
I also became incredibly adept with my mouth and tongue. With smaller cocks I even learned to take them into my throat.
I was sexy and enticing. I made each man feel like a sex god. Most of them came back for more.
When having sex I generally wore a sheer ,shortie ‘baby doll’ nightie,bra stockings and suspenders and lacy French knickers all in black. Maybe a bit of a cliché but it certainly seemed to turn men on.
Similarly my makeup was overdone with lots of eyeliner,mascara,blue eyeshadow and scarlet lipstick. Just this side of trashy but it spelled out S-E-X.
Madam was able to cease her seamstress activities because of all the money I was earning for her so she focused her attention entirely on my further transformation and training.
In spite of my sexual exertions I was still required to rise early to fulfil my domestic duties and to attend to Madams’ cunt and hole.
She became particularly fond of my attentions to her ‘other’ orifice and would make me long periods with my my tongue inside it instructing me to make occasional forays to her delectable cunt.
Although cock was my daily preoccupation her cunt was an object of worship to me as was Madam herself. When I say worship I mean that in a literal sense,she was godlike to me ,I was unable to function without her.
Beating and humiliation was still a daily occurrence necessary to reinf***e my lowly position. My training and further transformation was Madams’ main agenda.
Genital torture was reserved for Sundays when I didn’t receive clients or on a quiet day which wasn’t very often now. Although this generally only happened once a week it had taken on a new extreme dimension. It was centered almost entirely on the systematic abuse of my balls.
Madam pierced the skin of my scrotum with a variety of sharp objects,larger and larger safety pins,knitting needles almost anything that could be f***ed through and the greater the pain caused, the better.
This reached new heights when one day she tied my balls tightly and pierced them with surgical needles of various sizes. This time not just through the skin but into the actual tissue of the testes. This was dangerous in the extreme but I begged her to continue until finally she thrust a large needle through the centre of both testicles skewering them together.
I nearly fainted with the pain and excitement.
We had now reached a new level,mere beatings would no longer be enough and although our activities had now become possibly life threatening it was impossible for her to stop. As her slave I had no control over the situation and as I desperately wanted to achieve deeper and deeper levels of submission and servitude I was a willing and eager partner to whatever was to happen next.
There was an unspoken word between us that whenever it entered my mind filled me with unspeakable excitement , castration. It was now inevitable and I longed for it to happen.
As a slave I was only allowed to speak to Madam when spoken to. If I wanted to speak to her I had to prostrate myself before her and humbly ask permission. The following day I threw myself at her feet.
“Well Suzanne what is it you want?”
“Please Madam,I beg you,please,please cut off my balls”
“You really want this?” “Yes, yes Madam!” “then you must beg me to do it every day and be tortured and beaten severely for asking” “thank you,thank you Madam”
“I will look in to the best way to do this seek some advice and meanwhile as you don’t want your balls I am going to beat them and pierce them as never before.
She commanded me to take off my clothes then gagged me and tied me to the bed.
I felt my balls being bound tighter than they had ever been,needles pushed in to the flesh,lots of them and then the beating with the spatula pushing the needles in even further with every stroke,the pain was intense,I exulted in it ‘destroy them,these horrible male appendages’ ran through my mind like a mantra as we both reached sexual arousal of an unprecedented level,v******e and passion combined with raw lust.
She lashed my straining erection beating it until it was livid with bruises and still I didn’t want her to stop. Finally she squatted over me and crushed her divine cunt in to my face. I buried my tongue inside her drinking deep of her female juices then alternately exploring her ‘other’ hole. She began a series of shattering orgasms grinding her sex into me.
When the violent waves of sex had subsided she remained with her cunt glued to my mouth then filled me with a stream of her warm nectar.
I relished every drop as if it was fine wine,to me it was infinitely better.
She untied me and left me to remove the needles and to attend to the considerable damage to my balls. They were bruised and bl**dy. She came to inspect them “the sooner we relieve you of those my girl,the better,now tidy yourself up and make yourself pretty”
Sally was one of Madam’s girlfriends. Since I was no longer allowed penetrative sex she frequently had sex with various women and Sally was her favorite.
They were a study in contrasts. Madam was small and petite and Sally was big and voluptuous,how I envied her large breasts!Occasionally I was allowed to join them in their sexual activities,obviously in a very submissive role. They would lie naked side by side,my mouth between Madam’s thighs whilst I inserted a dildo into Sally’s cunt and fucked her gently with it. After a while I would be instructed to lick the juices off the dildo and to change sides servicing Sally with my tongue and Madam with the dildo.
Sally also liked the dildo in her arse. Before lubricating and inserting it I had to worship her hole kissing it and cleaning inside and out with my tongue. Whilst I penetrated Sally with the dildo I performed on Madam’s ‘other’ hole with my tongue and lips.
From time to time Sally liked to fuck me with a strap on dildo whilst Madam smothered me with her cunt holding her labia apart before sitting on me so that it was difficult for me to breathe as she fucked my face.
Sally was a nurse and it was this fact that made the next step in my feminisation possible.
In the 1960’s it was very difficult to obtain female hormones certainly not legally but Sally had the connections and wherewithal to obtain an unlimited supply. It obviously came at a price but that was no longer a problem with all the money that Madam was making hiring out my sexual services.
One morning Madam gave me three small white tablets. “These are estrogen pills,6 milligrammes in all,you are to take these every morning. Soon your skin will soften and your breasts will start to grow,you won’t have to shave your body hair so frequently. Also you are to take these other pills every evening,they are called anti-androgens and they will reduce the amount of testosterone you produce,that horrible male hormone,and make the estrogen more effective.
Your body fat will re-distribute itself so that your hips are wider and rounder. Your penis and balls will become smaller which will please me. Hopefully one day soon we will remove them permanently. There is no turning back,once you have taken these hormones for a few months the effect will be permanent,you will be a woman”
I was astonished,I knew it was somehow possible but now my dream was to come true!
I swallowed the pills religiously morning and evening.
For a while the only sensation was some tingling and sensitivity around my nipples until one glorious morning I realised that my breasts had started to develop. Almost imperceptibly at first but after about three months I had small soft budding breasts with plump nipples. I was in heaven!
From then on the changes were more pronounced I soon filled a 36A bra and had a respectable cleavage. My hips rounded,(I was curvy!)my skin became soft.
The psychological effect was just as great,I felt feminine both outwardly and inwardly then one day a momentous event happened which speeded my transformation and made it even more permanent.
As predicted my penis and testicles had become smaller. When undressed these were the only thing that could possibly identify me as ever being male. The rest of me was all woman. My breasts really excited my male visitors and most of them preferred to fuck me naked so they could spend time sucking my tits.
They had become quite large by now and I was really proud of them and flaunted them constantly. Although I really hated my male appendages it really turned the men on to see such a thing on a curvy,sexy,teenage girl.
One morning Madam informed me that there would be no visitors for the next month.
“You will need time to recover Suzanne because you are to have your dearest wish,we are going to remove your balls and get rid of that nasty testosterone forever! You will be nice and smooth between your legs, you can stop taking the anti-androgens and because you won’t be making any testosterone the eostrogen will be even more effective.
Who knows,soon your tits might be bigger than Sally’s!
These words made me faint with excitement,I threw myself at her feet crying with gratitude but wondering how this fantastic thing could be achieved. Madam explained it to me.
“Sally and I were going to use something called an elastrator,it applies a very tight rubber band to the top of your scrotum and cuts off the bl**d supply. Within a few hours your testicles die and after two days or so it is possible just to cut them off,leaving the band in place till it has healed.
However the result would not be smooth as there would remain a little nub of tissue and there are also risks involved.
Sally knows a junior doctor who has a predilection for transsexuals and he is willing to do a surgical procedure which is very simple.
In return he wants you to live with him for a week and do everything he desires no matter how extreme. I’m sure you will enjoy it,Sally tells me he has a very large cock!you had better prepare as he is coming this evening”.
I spent the rest of the day in an agony of anticipation and excitement. I performed my domestic duties,serviced madam’s cunt and hole and gratefully received a severe beating. Madam was very sexually aroused at the thought what was about to happen and made me spend most of the morning with my mouth between her legs. I couldn’t satisfy her even after several orgasms.
She beat me with a cane and a paddle until my bum was bright red,she spent an hour inserting very large dildos inside me eventually fisting me pushing her arm in the furthest it had ever been then suddenly she had an idea.
“You won’t be able to produce cum after today Suzanne,you must come inside Madam’s cunt one very last time as a very special privilege and then lick and suck me feasting on your last drops of cum ever. The only spunk that will ever be in your body after tonight will be floods of it from hundreds of cocks!”
She positioned me on my back on the bed and squatting over me she engulfed my tiny cock with her wet and juicy love hole.
She stretched out on top of me and began to gently fuck me,squeezing my girly cock with her pelvic muscles. She tweaked my engorged nipples and buried her tongue in my mouth kissing me passionately. I hadn’t been allowed to come for a long time and as Madam’s movements became more urgent I knew that it wouldn’t be long before I reached orgasm.
“Come on Suzanne fill Madam’s cunt with your cum,use your balls for the very last time before I cut them off,you will just be left with your pathetic tiny cock so make good use of it now,give me pleasure slave,give me your cum!”
These words excited me so much that I immediately emptied every last drop of the contents of my balls into Madams’ hungry sex in an orgasm more intense than I had ever experienced.
When we had both recovered she slowly removed my cock and careful not to spill a drop she straddled my face and let the creamy contents of her cunt ooze into my mouth. I eagerly lapped and sucked savoring the taste of her divine love hole mixed with my cum until I had swallowed it all and Madams’ cunt was again pristine.
She inspected herself to make sure not one drop remained and when all was to her satisfaction she tied me to the bed and gagged me..
“I have a surprise for you Suzanne,although we aren’t going to use it to castrate you Sally and I actually obtained an elastrator.
it’s a pity to waste it so I am going to amuse myself with it for a while.
She produced a device that had two handles and a ratchet device for stretching a thick band of rubber. When fully extended it fitted comfortably over my balls. When it was positioned correctly at the top of my scrotal sac Madam released the rubber band. It snapped on to my skin with the f***e of a fully tightened vice.
The gag muffled my scream,the pain was both excruciating and exciting as I had developed a high pain threshold thanks to the daily beatings and genital torture but I had never experienced anything as immediately intense as this before. My reaction excited Madam,she removed my gag and stifled my moans by grinding her cunt in to my face.
After a while as I lay softly moaning on the bed Madam showed me several other things she had recently acquired.
“I was saving all this for another time to heighten your pain/pleasure even more but I am unable to stop now I want to go beyond anything we have ever done before,I think you are ready. Look at these nipple clamps,they tighten from both sides and have sharp points that penetrate your flesh,and this is a surgical speculum,used for internal examinations I am going to slowly open you up,wider and wider as though you were giving birth”
The pain in my lower regions was agonising as the band bit into my flesh but it was the most exciting feeling I had ever had.
Madam placed the clamps on my massively erect nipples and began to tighten the screws. I felt nothing at first because of the intense pain in my groin but as the points pierced the flesh at the base of my nipples I felt ecstatic,my whole body was a sea of pain and intense sexual arousal and it was only a beginning!
She untied me and turned me over, the pain in my breasts was unimaginable as my body weight pushed against the clamps.
I felt my arse being lubricated and the speculum inserted to it’s fullest extent. I felt my hole widen as Madam slowly tightened the screw mechanism. Every few minutes she made the device extend further until it felt as though I would split apart,but I didn’t want her to stop,I craved even more. Madam obliged by whipping my back raising great red welts,I was complete because I had now been reduced to nothing,an object of complete and utter subservience who existed purely for the gratification of others and a willing partner in a journey beyond normal sex and pain,absolutely no limits.
After a while the beating stopped,Madam loosened the speculum and slowly removed it leaving my hole,huge,empty and gaping.
She took away the nipple clamps leaving my nipples sore and swollen and carefully cut away the band from my balls,which had turned a blue/black color. “we have to stop Suzanne otherwise the damage to your balls would be permanent and we have to prepare you for tonight. What has just occurred was fantastic,so much pain,so much sexual pleasure.
We cannot stop now we must go much further but the next step might be dangerous,life threatening but you have no choice you have to submit to everything I want to do to you no matter how extreme. You have no will,you cannot exist without me,I created you and you are my possession,completely submissive and subservient,a nothing,a hole unless I decree otherwise. Now kneel before me and worship me”
I threw myself before her and bowed my head.
” repeat these words,which you must say to me every day,’I worship you Madam,I cannot exist without you,you have the power of life and death over me and I submit to anything you wish to do to me’
I eagerly repeated the words,tonight I would willingly sacrifice my balls and perhaps my cock would be next, whatever Madam sought fit to do with me I would humbly and gratefully comply.
The evening soon came and Sally and the doctor whose name was Simon arrived
Simon explained that he would give me a local anesthetic in my groin area,slice through the skin of my scrotum and remove each testicle.
He would cut and tie off each cord that channeled the sperm to my penis and push them into my abdominal cavity.
He would cut and shape the loose skin and sew it neatly between my legs. I would need to wear a dressing on it for a week or two but it should soon heal and there would be no visible scarring. The whole procedure would take about an hour.
It sounded wonderful to me!And it was wonderful,because of the local anesthetic I felt no pain or discomfort and everything went according to plan.
After two weeks I was able to dispense with the dressing. Every time I looked at my naked reflection in the mirror I marveled at the smoothness between my legs,it was a miracle to me.
During the month of my operation and subsequent recovery Madam allowed me to do lighter domestic duties. Beating was off limits for the time being but such was our now all embracing sado/masochistic relationship that it was impossible to exist without the giving and receiving of pain and punishment.
Madam was impatient to resume where we left off on the day of my castration but it wasn’t possible until I was completely healed.
I started every day on my knees reciting my litany of worship to Madam and dutifully servicing her cunt and hole with my tongue and lips and making sure there was not one single vestige of pubic hair as she liked to be perfectly smooth and hair free.
Often she would relieve herself in my mouth ,I greedily swallowed every drop savoring her warm salty nectar.
In place of beating Madam usually nipple clamped me with an even more fearsome flesh piercing pair. There was a chain suspended between them with a weight attached which swung whenever I moved resulting in constant,exhilarating pain.
Also systematic humiliation replaced the daily beatings. I was often required to spend whole days crawling on my hands and knees naked.
Madam began to delight in bondage and found endless new ways in which to restrain me. I would be blindfolded and tied to the bed for hours at a stretch nipple clamps in place.
One day I was bound tightly and placed lengthways across the bed with my head protruding over the side. “Something new and exciting today Suzanne”She placed a hood over my head with an opening cut out for my mouth.
“This is a dental speculum,it will keep your mouth wide open as long as I wish”. She inserted it in my mouth and adjusted a mechanism which opened my mouth widely and locked it in place.
“I know that I pee in your mouth every day,but that is part of your duties as my cunt slave, today you have become merely a toilet. Sally is coming round later for drinks,lots of wine,
so we will keep you very busy pissing into you.
Also you will lick us clean when we have finished and don’t you dare spill a single drop!”
She squatted over me and directed a copious stream into my throat and when she had done she sat on my face whilst I licked her cunt clean. The feeling of helplessness and absolute humiliation thrilled me,I had been reduced to a mere object,a repository for piss.
I heard Sally arrive shortly after.
They must have consumed a large amount of wine because I was used seven or eight times that afternoon. I loved the contrast between Madams’ sweet vagina and Sally’s, voluptuous,with large lips that my nose slipped between,almost smothering me as I licked her clean. I was very privileged to service two such wonderful objects of my veneration.
Later on Madam released me from all my restraints. “You have done well,not a drop spilled,maybe we should have a party and use you for our toilet,I’m sure you will like it because you will have cocks to take care of too!what do you think of that?
“I would feel privileged to be able to serve you but I don’t feel worthy Madam”
“The right answer Suzanne,I must make you so that you are absolutely nothing,so that you would beg for the honour of being used in such a way,when you are completely healed I will do things to you that are beyond the bounds of imagining,where it will end I don’t know but I am impatient to begin”
I thrilled to these words, I was impatient too.
A week or so later Madam did throw a party,(actually more like an orgy) and I was indeed for the earlier part of the event used as a repository by both the male and female guests.
Occasionally I tasted cum when a man excited by my breasts and cock masturbated into my mouth.
Later on when I had been released from my bonds I was allowed to dress in my maids uniform.
Madam announced that everyone should make use of me as they wished.
As I wasn’t yet allowed to be penetrated I sucked several cocks,swallowed lots of cum and buried my tongue in a variety of juicy holes both male and female. All around was a scene of complete abandon as men fucked men,women fucked women ,men and women fucked together in combinations of two,three and more. I hadn’t had any cock inside me for over two weeks and desperately wanted to be fucked,unfortunately that wasn’t possible until my stitches were removed.
I joined two men who were having sex doggy style and laid underneath them sucking the ‘bottom’s’ cock whilst watching the others large cock pounding into his arsehole.
I was rewarded with a delicious mouthful of his cum as the other man filled his arse with spunk. The bottom sat astride me held his arse cheeks apart and told me to lick and suck the cum from his hole which I did greedily.
I watched fascinated as woman sat astride a man with his cock in her arse and another man penetrated her cunt,later on I ate spunk from both her orifices.
By now I had stripped down to my panties and had my tits sucked by both men and women.
The room was alive with of moans of ecstasy as orgasms were achieved,the wonderful wet sound of cunts and arseholes being penetrated the slapping sound of balls against arse cheeks naked flesh everywhere and in the midst of all this,me,Suzanne,servicing cocks,vaginas and arseholes with my mouth,a sex slave,an object of degradation,sub-human, completely submissive and subservient and still I wanted more and more,there were no limits to how far I would go to achieve absolute servitude and submission,till every fibre of my being was possessed by Madam.
I couldn’t wait to begin the next stage of our journey.
Before this could happen however there was the small matter of my obligation to Simon.
A week later the stitches were removed and the result pronounced a success. I marvelled at my reflection in the mirror,at the wonderful smoothness between my legs. My cock was the only thing that looked out of place although thankfully it had shrunk and was now only about 4″ when erect and a tiny nub when flaccid.
I preferred to think of it as an overly large clitoris.
The following week I moved in with Simon to be totally at his disposal for the next seven days. It was the first time I had been parted from Madam in nearly a year and it felt very strange. However I had received instructions from her to do absolutely anything that Simon desired.
When I arrived at his house he kissed me passionately and led me by the hand to his bedroom.
He undressed me slowly before taking off his clothes. When we were both naked he kissed me again and again then pushed me gently on to the bed. He laid on top of me and sucked my tits until my nipples were plump and engorged. By then my tiny cock was stiff but Simon’s erection was enormous. “You’re gorgeous Suzanne,I have been waiting for this moment for weeks”he said. “What would you like most of all?””Your cock,please,please Simon” I gasped.
He squeezed lubricant on to his fingers and applied it around my hole and to his cock. Kneeling between my legs he put a hand under my bum and raised me up to meet the glistening tip of his cock which he pressed against my arsehole. I eagerly pushed forward to meet his gorgeous 8″ or more of thick, rigid man flesh. My hole opened like a flower as the head of his cock slipped in to me.
He fucked me with long slow strokes until I had received every inch of him inside me and his balls rested against me. We stayed like this for a minute or two his cock throbbing inside my love hole. He teasingly withdrew until just the tip was still inside before plunging it back in right to the hilt. He slowly repeated this several times until his movements became more urgent and he began to fuck me in earnest until he was ramming it in to me with fast hard, violent strokes.
“Tell me what you want slut” “Your cock Simon,fuck me,fuck me,harder,fill me with cock!” “What are you Suzanne?” ” a slut,your cockslut,your whore,your slave!”
These words spurred him to even greater efforts,my head banged against the headboard as he launched a frenzied attack on my hole his balls banging violently against me until with a cry he emptied himself inside me.
When we both had recovered he slid his cock out of my hole and laid on his side instructing me to lick off the last vestiges of cum and to keep his cock in my mouth.
I licked and sucked him clean. He was soon asl**p but I dare not move and so remained for about an hour with him between my lips. I felt him go soft but when I heard him stirring I began to suck gently until he was fully hard again. “Can’t wait for it Suzanne you cockslut,whore can you?well you will get some more shortly and as I am your master for a week that is what you will call me,understood? “Yes Master” I replied thankful that my role was to be my usual one of subservience and obedience.
I had a suspicion that he might want romance and I would not have known how respond to it.
He laid on his back his now conspicuous erection standing to attention.
“First suck me then sit on my cock facing me so I can play with your tits” he commanded.
I went down on him until the head of his cock touched my throat and then careful not to gag
I eased it carefully in and swallowed until my lips rested against his tummy.
I had only ever done this with much smaller cocks and I felt a sense of achievement as his cock filled the whole of my throat and mouth. I eased my lips back up his shaft and then swallowed him again,then again and again.
“You cocksucking slut,that is incredible! I want to come in your throat sometime but I want your arse again now,sit on me”
I squatted over him and guided the swollen end of his cock into my recently fucked hole and slowly sat down until I was sitting astride him my perfectly smooth crotch resting on his tummy.
He reached up and roughly squeezed my nipples. “your tits are getting bigger Suzanne and they will continue to grow now there is no testosterone to interfere with the effect of the estrogen,you are going to be a very big girl indeed!”He lunged upwards burying his cock even deeper inside me. As he withdrew it I sat on him and soon we had established a rhythm that brought him close to orgasm. He spurted another load of creamy cum nectar deep into my arse.
I leaned forward and as his cock slid out I went down on him taking him into my throat staying locked in this position until his erection subsided.
“This week I’m going to have you in every possible way” he said and that’s what happened.
He fucked me in every imaginable position,he came on my face,in my hair,in my mouth and on my tits,the latter by putting his cock between my cleavage and pushing my tits together and fucking them whilst I teased the end of his cock with my tongue.
He laid me in the bath, stood over me and pissed in my open mouth and over my body.
I spent the whole week naked even when cooking and serving meals. He started each day by eating breakfast naked apart from a robe while I knelt under the table and sucked his cock.
When we weren’t fucking he penetrated me with a variety of large dildos or phallic objects,I particularly remember a huge cucumber that took almost 30 minutes of lubricating and manipulating before it eventually slid inside me.
He also liked to fist me.
He was very good at this and managed on one occasion to get his arm inside me almost to the elbow!The sensation was indescribable. He particularly liked me to deep throat him and I became very adept at this going straight down on him and taking in his whole cock in one movement. By experimenting he found he could position me with my head over one side of the bed and by squatting over me he could fuck me in the throat filling it directly with cum.
He even slept with his cock inside me. His sexual energy was boundless every day was a fuckfest. At the end of the week I had lost count of the number of times I had been fucked or penetrated in some way. My hole was almost permanently agape. I had also swallowed what seemed like pints of cum. I had been debauched,used,abused and humiliated,dehumanized,reduced to two orifices for his sexual gratification but I felt I needed to go further to plumb greater depths of degradation and subservience.
I had begged him to beat me but he was more interested in fucking,he did spank me a couple of times but I needed whipping,nipple clamping,binding,restraining,taking to where Madam had left me before my castration and beyond. I needn’t have worried,it was all waiting for me at home.
On a lighter note because of the lack of testosterone and the large daily doses of estrogen my body had become even more feminized.
My skin was soft and smooth,my eyes bright and my complexion flawless. My hips were becoming more rounded and my breasts and nipples were really something to behold. I was thrilled but not in a vain way. Vanity was something forbidden in my lowly position. The more attractive I became the more use I was to Madam, the more clients I would attract,the more money I would earn for her,the more I would please her.
When I arrived home Madam told me to go the spare bedroom and wait. When I opened the door I couldn’t believe my eyes,in my absence the place had been transformed.
In the centre of the room was a padded table similar to the ones that physiother****ts use with a hole for your face, but this one had adjustable straps attached to each side. A large wooden construction in the shape of an X was bolted to one wall.
Footrests were attached to the bottom spars of the X frame both fitted with adjustable straps. Two more straps were attached to the upper part and in the middle a wooden plate was screwed to the wall fitted with a wide leather strap. A rack was filled with whips,canes and paddles of all sizes. A shelf contained a selection of dildos and other phallic objects,some of them enormous in size.
A hoist was bolted to the ceiling with two metal rings a couple of feet apart set in the floor directly underneath.. Hanging from hooks on the wall were manacles,gags a black rubber hood with mouth and eye holes.
A chest of drawers contained nipple clamps, some glass rods of various diameters,speculums of various types and a selection of what looked like surgical instruments.
I looked at all this with a mixture of excitement and fear. ” I am eager to begin Suzanne” said Madam as she entered the room “but I’m sure Simon has exacted more than his entitlement and you must rest because as from tomorrow you will not leave this room for several days.
Also starting tonight,you will no longer share my bed you must sl**p on the floor at the foot of the bed as befits your lowly station,I will call you if I wish to relieve myself during the night”.
Apart from the discomfort of lying on the floor I slept very little that night my mind in a whirl,thinking about what was to begin the following morning.
I rose early and attended to both my domestic and cunt slave duties.
It was wonderful to savour the taste of Madam’s vagina once more. She was in a very excited state and kept me between her thighs for a very long time. After about an hour and several orgasms later she instructed me to go to my ‘new home’ kneel on the floor naked bow my head and wait her arrival.
What happened next came as a total surprise. I heard her enter the room.
” Come here Suzanne” I looked up and saw that she was naked. “Come here”
She embraced me and kissed me passionately pressing her body against me crushing our breasts together as our tongues intermingled. She held me at arms length and kissed my breasts. “My creation,my perfect girl,your feminisation is almost complete,you will continue to grow softer and more voluptuous,I desire every inch of you even your girly cock, my vagina has become wet just from looking at you.
But my desire goes much further. I already own you but I need to possess you completely and utterly,to absorb you, so that you cease to be a separate being and become incapable of functioning without me. You will become so completely submissive that you will do absolutely anything that I command without a moments hesitation,you will adore me and worship me,your only reason for existing will be to please me.
” But I feel that way already Madam” I said “That may be but when you reflect on what you have just said in two or three months time, you will realise that you are only beginning,that the level of mindless,unquestioning obedience,complete dependency and total servitude that I demand will only have been attained by what we are about to begin today”
“We will explore every conceivable way of giving and receiving pain and punishment,every way that your lovely feminine body can be used to give pleasure,you will live in a world of sensation where your only focus apart from pleasing me will be to beg for punishment because it will become your only gratification unlike the legions of men who will pay me for the use of your body,now kiss my feet and then worship before my cunt and we will begin”.
Madam strapped me face down on the table. The restraints were very efficient allowing very little movement. As the first stinging stroke of the cane caressed my arse cheeks I realized that there was no turning back.
The caning continued for ten minutes or so,the sharp pain as the cane cut into my flesh was familiar and I adored it. Madam paused and I felt the coldness of KY gel in contrast to the tingling heat of my cheeks as it was applied to my hole.
Then the coldness of the metal speculum as it slid into my hole and the screws tightened. The beating continued with pauses every few minutes to enlarge the speculum until my hole was so stretched I felt as if I would split in two. Although Madam was caning my individual arse cheeks occasionally the cane caught the speculum and I felt a vibration deep inside my hole.
Eventually,after what must have been an hour she undid the restraining straps and told me to stand up.
My wrists were bound together and a loop passed over the hook on the hoist.
She pulled on a chain and I was lifted towards the ceiling suspended by my wrists the tips of my toes just touching the floor. My arse cheeks were hot and tingling and almost numb. I delighted in the delicious feeling of helplessness and vulnerability,my hole gaping open as I hung from the hoist. Madam attached clamps to my breasts screwing the points so that they pierced my erect nipples.
The pain as the sharp points burrowed into my flesh was exquisite. She attached a chain and a weight was suspended from it pulling against the embedded points and intensifying the pain even more. Although it was almost to much to endure I wanted more. If only I had known just how much more there was to come that day!
Madam selected a large whip with hard knots at the end of the flails and began to lash my back.
As the nine knots made contact with my skin a whole new world of pain began.
After a while all the sources of pain began to come together resulting in a heightened sensation of d**g like intensity. I began to realize what was happening. I couldn’t live without this,couldn’t live without Madam who bestowed this upon me and in doing so became aroused beyond all normal definitions of sexual arousal.
I felt myself being lowered to the floor and untied,I was in a dreamlike state.
Madam laid back on the table and opened her legs wide. I plunged my tongue into her cunt licking and sucking frenziedly as wave after wave of orgasms consumed her. I swear we both must have been near death at that moment. As I glued my mouth around her vagina
I began to hallucinate. I felt as though I was being absorbed into her cunt becoming part of it,becoming her cunt.
I knew at that moment that I no longer wanted to exist as a separate entity but as an integral and dependent part of Madam.
When we had recovered from our exertions Madam removed the speculum and inserted a huge plug type dildo in its place. As my hole was so massively agape it slipped in easily and my sphincter closed over the narrow neck holding it in place with the two tabs at the base nestling between my arse cheeks.
She secured me to the table this time lying on my back,a neck strap prevented me from lifting my head.
She took off the chain that was attached to the nipple clamps but left them in place. The pain from my pierced and stretches nipples contrasted with the almost comforting fullness of the huge dildo inside my hole.
“Your hole is nicely stretched although I intend to make it even bigger and you can accommodate the biggest cock in your mouth particularly with your talent for deep throating so now we are going to create another orifice,your girly cock.
We are going to stretch your piss hole by inserting larger and larger glass rods inside. It may take a while,perhaps a week, but I won’t stop until I can get my finger in. We are going to turn it into a cock/vagina. “
She grasped my tiny cock and applied some lubricant to the tip. ” I am going to do this gently because I don’t want to damage you,it will feel uncomfortable at first but if you relax and place your trust in me you will soon be begging me to insert the largest of objects as you are such an insatiable girl”
I felt the glass rod pressing against the slit at the end of my tiny uncircumcised cock.
Applying a little pressure Madam slowly pressed it past the opening and it slipped slowly in,surprisingly easily. “This one is only 1/8″ in diameter you have about 8” of it inside you so it is right inside your cock and inside your abdomen. Eventually I will push each rod right down inside your bladder”She took it out and then re-inserted it several times until it slipped in and out with ease. She repeated the same exercise with a 3/16″diameter rod.
“I will spend about 30 mins every day stretching you until you really do have another hole”
She pushed the rod right inside my cock and secured it by taping my foreskin together.
“Now I am going to leave you to reflect on what has happened today,you have done well, so perhaps I will beat you again in a while. “
She released me from the table and then secured me to the X shaped cross,my feet on the rests with straps around my ankles my wrists secured in a similar way.
She pulled the rubber hood over my head. There were holes for my eyes,nose and mouth. She placed a large ball (which had straps attached) in my mouth and secured the straps gagging me very effectively.
A blindfold was tied over my eyes. I was unable to see,hear or speak. I had a large dildo buried deep inside my hole,my nipples were clamped (with the chain and weight re-instated) and a glass rod was inside my cock.
I felt the large leather straps of the neck restraint tighten around my neck holding my head against the wall.
I was completely and utterly helpless but sublimely happy in the knowledge that I was reduced to the state of nothingness that I craved.
After what seemed like hours in this state of crucifixion( I had no way to judge the time) Madam released me. She took off the nipple clamps,pulled out the dildo and took the rod from my cock.
She secured me to the table and taking a cane she beat me very,very hard until my bottom was once more red with welts.
That night I slept naked on the punishment table. I rose early as usual to prepare myself,put on perfectly applied makeup ,donned my maids uniform ready for my round of morning duties as both domestic and cunt slave. When all was to Madams’ satisfaction she sent me to the wait for her with instructions to lie on my back on the floor with me legs wide open and my eyes shut.
When she arrived she blindfolded me. I felt something being attached to each of my ankles,some sort of device that spread my legs apart. What felt like manacles were fastened to each ankle and wrist. I heard the noise of the hoist being operated as I was slowly lifted upside down into the air. A pause as my wrists were chained to the rings in the floor and then the hoist resumed until I was suspended from the ceiling my arms and legs wide apart.
I felt the speculum being inserted and tightened to its fullest extent. Next were the nipple clamps, immediately tightened so that the points pierced the flesh at the base of my nipples.
The chain was attached with a heavier than usual weight which was swinging freely and causing ripples of exquisite agony. I ceased to focus on the pain in my breasts as my bum was subjected to a furious caning,long hard,relentless,violent,stinging strokes.
I cried partly because of the sudden and intense pain but also tears of joy knowing that I was about to be transported to a new level of pain and punishment. The caning ceased but without pause I felt the whip lash my upper back as Madam worked her way down my body until it became a sea of sensations, agonizing pain,heat and longing.
She ripped off my blindfold and grabbed my head which was conveniently at the right level and crushed her vagina into my face.
I feasted hungrily on it as Madam reached one climax after another. I felt once again the experience of being absorbed,wishing that the essence of me could be sucked in to her darling hole , to be completely consumed by her so I could remain ever just a part of her font of femininity,her cunt.
She continued to fuck my mouth for some time and then lowered me to the floor and removed the various restraints and the speculum.
As before a butt plug was inserted in its place but an even larger one than the previous day. The chain and weight was removed from the nipple clamps but they remained on my breasts.
We were both physically and emotionally drained even Madam was stunned by the intensity of what had just occurred. “There are no limits to what I will do to you Suzanne,I thought it would take a week to reach the level that we began at today but I cannot wait,whatever the ultimate outcome I cannot stop I must go as far as it is possible to go”
” Please,please possess me,absorb me,do the most unspeakable things to me Madam”
I sobbed begging her to continue.
“We will attend to your cock now, get on the table, I will strap you in”
Madam started with the 3/16″ glass rod which soon was replaced with a 1/4″ size. This also was soon easy to accommodate. Madam persevered for about an hour until I had a 3/8″ rod deep inside as far as my bladder. “I’m going to secure it by sewing your foreskin together temporarily,I will be careful to avoid any bl**d vessels so we don’t have any mess.
Using a surgical needle Madam sewed up the end of my cock,the pain was indescribable but pain and punishment in all it’s many forms was all I craved.
As on the previous day I was secured to the cross unable to see,hear or move. The chain was re-attached to the nipple clamps and a heavy weight suspended from it. The glass rod at was sewn inside my cock and the large dildo filled my hole.
I felt so close to Madam,today had been another step further along the path to complete submission.
What seemed like many hours later I was released from my restraints,my cock was unseen and the dildo removed.
Madam strapped me to the table on my back and blind folded me. I felt a needle pierce my foreskin then withdrawn,then another larger needle took its place,then with some difficulty accompanied by agonizing pain a large object was f***ed through the hole.
Madam removed the blindfold to reveal a tiny silver padlock holding my foreskin shut.
“You must beg me to unlock you if you need to relieve yourself, fortunately your cock remains limp almost permanently now those nasty male hormones have been excised from your body.
You must pull it back and forth through your skin until the hole heals and becomes large and permanent,I will inspect you every day.
My every movement,function and thought was becoming completely under her control I was being transformed into a being that could not exist independently of her. She was unable and unwilling to control the desperate d**g like need to inflict pain,punishment and torture upon me and for my part I could no longer live without it,it bound us inextricably together and I was cast as the completely subservient,submissive,slave who would endure anything to bring her sexual fulfillment and pleasure and in doing so found my own fulfillment.
Most ‘normal’ people would have considered what we did as depraved but there was nothing depraved about what we shared it was the highest and most intense expression of sexual love. I had known no other relationship and wanted no other if it couldn’t be like this.
I wanted to be a woman, Madam made this happen. I wanted to have sex with men, Madam made it possible for me to be have more cock than I ever dreamed of,to be fucked in every imaginable way.
I also fulfilled her deepest,darkest, sexual needs,she had become completely lesbian and although she often had sex with Sally what passed between us was real sex,two women one the ultimate dominatrix,the other the ultimate submissive achieving the ultimate sexual high by the giving and receiving of pain and punishment.
The following morning I was told to go to the room where I received clients.
There was a large waterproof sheet on the floor.
Michael and Simon were waiting,they were naked. Two other men also naked,who I didn’t know,were lying on the bed kissing and playing with each others cocks. “These are your first four visitors,four more will arrive in about an hour,they have my permission to fuck you and use you in any way they please.
You will do anything they ask. I will be watching the whole time. You must demonstrate to me that you have become nothing more than two holes,a repository for cock,for cum and for piss.
Simon pulled me towards him and kissed me,then he pushed me on to the bed and told me to lie near the edge with my legs raised. He slapped some lube between my legs and on his cock and without any preliminaries rammed it inside me right up to his balls. Michael was on all fours over my head and lowered his cock into my mouth. I began to suck and lick him as Simon furiously pounded his cock into my hole.
After a few minutes I felt him empty the contents of his balls deep inside my love hole. A few seconds later Michael filled my mouth with cum I licked and swallowed anxious not to miss a drop. As soon as Simon had withdrawn his cock one of the other men positioned himself between my legs and buried himself in me. “What do you want,slut” he said ” Cock,oh please give me your cock,fuck me,fuck me!” the last few words were unintelligible as my mouth was filled with hard manflesh.
I sucked hungrily eager for a second helping of creamy spunk.
Simon raised my right arm and closed my fingers around his shaft. ” Wank me cockslut, keep me hard” Michael’s cock was similarly placed in my left hand and I squeezed and masturbated both of them as I was being filled with cock from both ends. The room was filled with the sounds of moaning,grunting and delicious squelching noises as my already cum filled hole was being reamed by another gorgeous throbbing member.
Suddenly my mouth was awash with more spunk. I ran my tongue around my mouth to savor the taste before gulping it down. Soon I felt a second fountain of cum explode inside me. Michael and Simon were leaning across my body and kissing passionately as I wanked them. They were soon ready for second helpings.
This time Michael fucked me,by now lubrication was unnecessary as I was so wet and slippery with spunk.
Simon pushed his cock between my lips” Deep throat me bitch” he said.
This was difficult in the position I was lying in but I did manage to get the tip of his cock in my throat as I sucked and licked his shaft.
I was aware of the door opening and the room felt crowded. The other four men that Madam spoke of had arrived. They were soon naked and two of them stood over me and masturbated excitedly watching Simon and Michael fucking me.
They both soon provided me with another helping of cock nectar. The two newcomers who were now pulling their cocks furiously both deposited copious amounts of spunk on my tits. Simon withdrew his cock from my mouth and as I was swallowing the last drops of his load I put my hands on my breasts to collect as much of the precious deposit as I could and spread it around my mouth and over my face.
Michael was still buried in me up to the hilt and as he slowly slid his shaft out of my hole one of the others eagerly took his place and immediately began to fuck me with hard urgent strokes. Any number of cocks were pushed in my mouth with exhortations to suck and clean them sometimes two at once.
For the next two hours or so my hole and my mouth were almost constantly filled with cock,my face and my tits were covered with cum which I frantically tried to eat( in the very few moments that my mouth was empty) by sucking it from my fingers as I tried to scoop it up.
I was an insatiable cockslut whore, willingly and gratefully and proud of it for Madams’ sake excitedly knowing that my performance would earn me the beating to end all beatings.
Finally they lifted me off the bed laid me on the waterproof sheet and all of them pissed on me. I smiled ecstatically, opened my mouth wide and greedily drank deeply.
Madam was very excited by my completely wanton behaviour and told me to clean myself up and go immediately to the bedroom.
“You have had far too much cock for one day. ,before we resume our programme it’s time to remind you that softness and voluptuousness is much better than all that throbbing hardness,that my cunt is superior. It is also very wet at present and will require a lot of attention from your tongue. Get between my legs and expect to stay there for at least an hour. “
I nestled in to my favourite place in the whole world and buried my face in the moist and fragrant folds of her cunt.
Later that day it was time for the final session before I went back to the day to day business of receiving clients. I had already achieved a level of submissiveness and subservience beyond anything I could have ever imagined. I would do anything,unquestioned and immediately no matter how perverted or servile (although those words were no longer in my vocabulary) as long as it pleased her. I was the perfect female slave.
Madam suspended me from the ceiling and began an extreme and systematic beating with the cane and the whip. Afterwards she told me to kneel at her feet.
“Will you do anything that I ask, no matter how extreme,immediately,without question?”
“Anything Madam” I replied. She slipped a rope with a noose around my neck and attached it to the hoist then handed me the chain which operated it.
“You know what to do Suzanne.
” Yes madam” I replied as I pulled on the chain and the noose began to tighten around my neck.
“Stop” she cried. “You are complete”.